≡ Menu

9 Ways Frank Kern Is Surviving Quarantine

Frank Kern Pajamas

Here’s what the internet marketing OG’s been up to these past few weeks.

1. Snuggling with his adorable Teacup French bulldog.

Frank Frenchie

2. Being his usual sarcastic self.

Kern Being Smartass

3. Sharing hilarious dude-with-big-package memes like all good degenerates should.

Frank Coronavirus Meme

4. Drinking Miller Lite from a Bride koozie because no f*cks given.

Kern Miller Lite Bride

5. Plenty of eye candy, thanks to his beautiful wife, Natalia.

7. Makin’ some time for video games.

Frank Kern Video Games

8. More boozin’.  This time, happy juice.

Frank Kern Wine Glasses

9. Dishin’ out solid advertising advice in his patented “aw shucks” style, which makes him likable AF.

Frank Kern Split Testing

Oh, and funny timing: just saw this ad from Frank Kern in my Facebook sidebar:

Kern Time To Get Sales Ad

Then, I hovered over it, and clicked the three dots in the upper right to see who he was targeting.

Frank Kern Facebook Targeting

As you can see, anyone who’s visited his website, who’s over 18 and livin’ in the U.S.  AKA me.

Curious, I clicked over to the landing page.

Frank Time To Get Sales Headline

Great hook, huh?  The pitch itself literally handles the objection I’m sure he gets with most of his other digital products, which is: “But you’re Frank Kern, of course it works for you.”


(Plus, I saw Billy Gene running a Gmail ad with basically the same hook, so I’m guessin’ that angle’s hotter ‘n’ a jalapeño handjob.  Ya know?  Noobs wanna see you go from nothin’ to somethin’ so they believe it’s possible—even for them.)


So then he lays out the offer: hundred bucks; build a new sales funnel… from scratch… with Kern himself; results not guaranteed; blah blah; beat the countdown timer or miss out.

Beautiful, easy-to-understand, hype-free copy—as always—by King Kern.  Not sure if there’s any upsells since obviously I didn’t buy, but my guess is he’s printin’ hundred dollar bills with this offer.  Covid schmovid, son.

Just goes to show, you can quarantine-and-chill and still do millions online.  Hang in there, homies.

Cory Johnson: your momma’s neighbor’s side chick’s last Uber Eats delivery guy’s third-favorite blogger. Here’s how he makes millions of dollars blogging without being bothered.