≡ Menu

When Online Marketers Say This, They Really Mean This

Shhh Internet Marketers Code

“I’ll have it done today.”

Equals: “It might get done tomorrow.”

“I’ll have it done tomorrow.”

Equals: “I’ll need a small miracle, a Starbucks IV, and a catheter to have it to ya this week.”

“It’s comin’ along nicely.”

Equals: “Just opened up a blank Text document to brainstorm.”

“I’ll get started right away.”

Equals: “‘Bout to slip into my gravy pants and stream Netflix while I wait for inspiration that’ll never come.”

*Like the, “I’m proud of you, son,” I longed for as a child.

Related: side-splitting digital marketing memes.

Cory Johnson: likes bumping #OnRepeat through the Bang & Olufsen sound system in his naturally aspirated V10; post-workout pumps; big boobs; dumb comedy; and your mom’s potato salad. He hates awkward handshakes. But who cares? Let’s talk about you.