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Tim Conway Quotes

Thomas Daniel

Tim Conway quotes: on his laid back approach to life, the great respect he had for his audience, not trying too hard, and more.

“Why do you do what you do?  Why do you dress the way you dress?  Why do you do what you do with your time?  Why do you watch what you watch on TV or at the movies or on the computer?  Do you have God-glorifying reasons for all of it?”

“I think you are only as good as you are today or tomorrow.  A lot of people like to live on laurels that happened 20 or 30 years ago but it’s nice to get awards.  It’s nice to be labeled and things like that but I’m not sure everybody qualifies.”

“I was dyslexic – was, still am – ’cause I would see words that weren’t there.  And people just started laughing, and I thought, ‘Well, this is a good way to make a living.’  I’ll just go downtown to read and have people laugh, you know?”

“I had no professional training.  I had a sense of humor and had been in front of a microphone.”

“When you’re small, you either are funny, or you get beat up a lot.”

“I figure you’re only here for a matter of moments.  Ever since I was a kid watching movies I’ve always wanted to make people laugh or have some sort of emotional reaction.”

“People often asked me, ‘If you were not in show business, what would you do?’  The truth is I don’t think there’s anything else I could be doing so the answer would have to be, ‘Nothing.’  I guess you could say I’m in the only business I could be in.”

“I just do these things, and, for the most part, they work out.  It’s not that I’m always on.  It’s not that I expect people to know who I am.  It’s just that I don’t take this tour called life all that seriously.”

“In my career, I’ve also tried to respect an audience.  I don’t think I’ve had to apologize for too much along the way.  There may have been a few slips, and I certainly am by no means a prude, but I just have a certain respect for the audience, and I would like them to come with the whole family, sit down, enjoy something, go home, and be able to talk about it.”

“I hope they see that we are still promoting comedy for comedy – that we don’t need all the extras.  We don’t need the language and violence and things of that nature, or reference to them, to be funny.  We want people to know that you can just be funny for funny.”

“I would get ill before going onstage – something about getting in front of people, and if they don’t laugh, I’m a bomb.  I got over it when somebody laughed.”

“It’s hard to be sad when you’re laughing, so I enjoy making people happy.”

“If only my folks had beaten me, I could have gotten some material about my miserable childhood.  But as it is, I’ve had a great life.”

“I have a very strong religious feeling about God and who put all of this together.  I don’t think this is all a big mistake and that somebody just threw it together.  If I wouldn’t offend my religion or God, why would I want to offend an audience because in effect those people are being watched over by the same person.   I think it has affected my life in that it has made me a better person.  I don’t do evil things to people.  I try to be as helpful as I can.  I try to do as much charitable work as I can.”

“This way of looking at the world has been with me almost all my life.  I was like that at Chagrin Falls High School.  I wasn’t a big kid, and if you weren’t tough, you had to be funny to get along.  I was like that in the Army, although they didn’t always have a sense of humor about it.”

“Bob Newhart and Dick Martin are two of my closest friends, and we share a kind of dry sense of humor about life.  We all feel that you’re only here once, so enjoy it while you’re here.”

“My career is pretty much over.  I’m out in the Valley eating soft-boiled eggs.”

“I’ve never really taken anything very seriously.  I enjoy life because I enjoy making other people enjoy it.”

“I just go merrily through life.  I enjoy people and I realize how fortunate I’ve been.  I never really tried to be a star.  I didn’t seek stardom.”

“I marvel at where I came from and what I was able to do.”

Related: David Letterman quotes.

Cory Johnson: CEO of a business he has yet to launch. As seen on your mom’s phone. Scaled to 7-figures in seven seconds selling a course on selling courses. Kidding. Watch this.